My thought of dating right now

I have completely given up on dating because I’ve not found anyone yet. I’m starting to think I’m supposed not to have a boyfriend or girlfriend. And that I’m supposed to be alone forever.

I really do believe this. The only way that this thought that I have can change is if I get into a relationship. Or if it’s proven to be fake.

But right now, I don’t think that is possible or even is gonna happen. I don’t think I’m unlovable. I just think that the possibility of that is happening is a low possibility.

I’ve been single for long time. And guys have screwed me over so much. My supposed to be friend Michael Yoegel a year ago I told him that I liked him and asking him if he would be willing to date me. He said he didn’t know and then ghosted me for two or three months. I found out he had a girlfriend on Instagram.

This is why I think I’m never going to have anyone in my life. Or that I’ll be by myself forever. The sooner that I accept this, the sooner I move on with my life and do more important things.

Relationships and Friendships are hard for the disabled people

Relationships and friendships are hard for the disabled people because when you think someone is your friend or partner, they do something that would hurt you or hurt you mentally, physically or emotionally. The person says yes to being your friend or partner and then they ghost you or cheat on you. It makes it hard for you to trust the person or want to be with the person.

When you tell your friend that you had a crush , it doesn’t help if they laugh at you. And it also doesn’t help if they rudely judge you for having a crush on them. Or if they humiliate you in front of everyone and tell everyone that you had a crush on them. Also it doesn’t help if they rudely rejected you.

It would have helped if they told you how they actually felt about you. Also if they have had said that I would if I was single. It also would have helped if they didn’t rudely rejected you , judged you or humiliated you. It would have helped if they kindly rejected you not hurt your feelings or humiliate you.

Another reason why Dating is hard for Disabled people

Another reason why dating is hard for disabled people is that when you tell the person that you like you have disabilities and would need help with a lot of things, they suddenly need time to think. Most of the time it just says that they are trying to think of a way to say no without looking like the bad guy. Some people might not be interested in an actual relationship, they just want hookups and no feelings attached.

Especially if you are disabled and asexual. Most people don’t understand what asexual means, they think it means that you like hookups too much. It actually means you are not interested or comfortable with hookups. It also means that you only like hugs, kisses, holding hands, cuddling, snuggling and being hold with consent. It is very awkward when the people assume you want to hookups because they don’t understand asexual.

Also if you ask the guy you like if they would be interested and willing to becoming girlfriend and boyfriend. And they either say nothing or they say they are not sure yet. You don’t know if that’s a good or bad thing. You guess it’s a good thing because at least they didn’t say no. Especially if you asked them two years ago and you asked someone else too. They said that they would if they didn’t have a girlfriend already. And the other person said that we are never ever ever going to date and that both of you knew that.

Dating is Harder For Disabled People

I’ve only had truly one relationship though I had two boyfriends. I’m only counting the last one I had. He cheated on me with four girls five times. My friend Kyle Chamovitz was so kind enough to inform me that my boyfriend was cheating on me. The four girls’ names were Logan, Natalie, Maria D and Maria V. My boyfriends name was Raymond Brady. Raymond cheated on me with Logan twice. After week after my sister broke up with her boyfriend Mitchell O. I broke up with Raymond because I was done with his promises of not cheating again and he’d change. After a year he tried to convince me that he had changed I didn’t care. It was too care. I thought I blocked him, I found out two months ago I didn’t. So I block his contact. On Instagram and Facebook, he asked to follow me so I blocked him. His friend Moises Holland tried to text me to ask me out. I pretended like I was a different person to get him to stop and then I blocked his number.

As I was saying… a lot of people didn’t want to date me because I have disabilities. It was hard to be denied just because I have disabilities. I hope that you have find a real relationship. And someone will like you even though you have disabilities. I have not really successfully succeeded because I was cheated on and lied to so many times. Anyway I hope that you find someone who is willing to love you and not to cheat on you or lie to you.

Two Good Places for Disabled People

The two places I’ve been and I believe are good for people who have disabilities. The first place is Disney World. That is because they’re really nice and assist the disabled people. They’re more accommodating and accepting of disabled people than most places. They’re for the most one of the safest places in the world, the only things you’d have to worry about are alligators and young children falling from a high place. The last place is Woodloch Pines. It’s a place in Poconos in Pa. It’s a family resort and it has a spa. Like Disney World , Woodloch Pines staff are super nice and love to assist the disabled people. They are also very accommodating and accepting of the disabled people. Also for the most part Woodloch Pines is safe, you don’t usually have to worry about wild animals coming in your rooms. You might have to worry about your children hurting themselves during playing or doing the sports. Both have wheelchair accessible rooms. Disney World has wheelchairs, and scooters. But you would have to be one of the first hundred people in the parks to get a scooter but there is usually always a wheelchair.

Being 21 is different from what I thought

I turned 21 on April 3rd. I thought that it would be so cool. I also thought that I would be going out to bars with friends. But it is the opposite of what I thought. It is so boring, depressing or not entertaining at all. It is because of the lockdown and coronavirus. It would be a lot more funnier if I could go to bars or parties with friends. Or even to hangout with friends. Most of the 21-25year olds are really into drinking and partying. Sorry not sorry. I used to say that all I wanted to do was stay home and do nothing. But now since it is all I can do. I’ve learned that I don’t wanna anymore. It must be very bad if I miss go horseback riding and going to the gym which I kinda didn’t liked to do.

Depression is harder to deal with disabilities

I’ve been dealing with depression from 2018 to present day. The main reason I was depressed was that my ex bff Mia Garito and I had a falling out and ending the friendship. It is a long long list of reasons why we ended our friendship. And because of it, I’ve been listening to a lot Billie Eilish. My new best friends Natalie Rossi and Anna Rainbow have tried to make me feel better as they possibly could. Mia might be depressed and mad at me now but I’ve stopped caring about her and what she wants or needs.

Here is the long long list.

December 25th ,2018 to January 18th,2019( still happening)

I asked Mia to hangout sometime and she said ,” I don’t want to sleepover anymore. I answered ,” I meant like go to a movie or mall or something like that,” She relied ,” I don’t like going to the mall with you because you’re not that fun.” I sent the texts to her mom. She said,”Mia was having a rough time lately and is grumpy with everyone.” Kyle moved from Ms Nutter’s child care program to Ms Smiley’s cooking program .

I believe that I’m absolutely done the whole thing , I shouldn’t have to put up with this kind of treatment. I think that I don’t wannabe friends anymore at this point

On Friday January 18th,2019

I officially finally ended our friendship.

On March 10th, 2019

We talked and got back to our friendship.

On June 16- November 23rd , 2019

Mia has stopped all contacting me.

On December 22nd, 2019

We were going to see the Jumanji movie but that didn’t happen. Kyle and Mia didn’t inform me that they were there or where they were. After waiting in the lobby for between twenty to a half hour, my sister and I left and then Kyle texted me when I got to Devon. He said they were in the theater watching the movie but they didn’t come out to the lobby to meet me and didn’t text me till it was too late. Neither of them apologized.

On February 18, 2020

Mia ended our friendship because she said that there were a lot of times where we didn’t get along well.

On February 20-24, 2020

I tried to ask her for my stuff back but she refused because we were NOT FRIENDS ANYMORE.

On February 25, 2020

I texted Mia. I said tell Cassidy I say hi. I wish the both of you the best. GOODBYE Miss Mia Juliette Garito have a wonderful ten years!

And that’s why I was depressed and have been listening to a lot of Billie Eilish. I hope that this doesn’t make you feel depressed and listen to a lot of Billie Eilish. She is a good artist though.

Walking the dog is harder with disabilities.

On Halloween of 2018, I got home from school. I just got my pug Bella outside and a older woman with her dog appeared. So I decided to try to pull Bella back inside to wait for the woman and dog to pass. I pulled Bella back to step but Bella literally pulled me closer to woman and dog. Dog was a curly white with black spots. Bella’s leash slipped out of my hand because I have cerebral palsy in my hands and feet. I guess Bella was playfully snapping at the dog. Bella must’ve gotten too close to the dog. The woman thought Bella bit her dog. She was totally fulled out yelled at me. Like ,” Get Your Dog! Get your dog! Get your stupid dog!” I continually said I’m trying to Ma’am.

As I bend down to pick up the leash, the woman hit me hard on my back. I hit her back but not hard. I yelled at her not to hit me. After that, woman and I moved back to my driveway. She started to yell at me again. Like,” Text or call your boss but she meant my mom.”So I pulled out my phone and began to text my mom as I’m telling the woman I can’t because she’s at work.

The woman didn’t care at all. She said,” Call your mom! Call her! I might need your info , I’ll have to go to the vet and then sue you, you’ll have to pay the bill!Hurry up! Just call her up!” She also said that she’ll need my info because she’d have to go to the vet , her dog is injured five or seven times. But like if the dog is injured it’s cause she was holding her dog so tightly. My awesome neighbor Bill heard the fight and asked me what happened. I tried to tell him as well as I could but I was so scared and nervous. Bill tried to calm down the woman. The leash slipped out of my hand again and Bill helped me pick it up as the woman was frantically screaming “Aahhhh!” After one or two minutes. I just walked in the house. I closed the door and locked it. I tried to text my mom as I cried so hard. My mom called me and I told her between cries. As soon as she got home I told the woman hit me hard on my back. She looked at my back and luckily no marks or bruises . The next or the day after next,my mom saw Bill as he saw my mom. Bill told my mom what have happened. A year later, my mom and I saw the woman and her dog. She still hasn’t sued us. On December I just started to walk Bella again. The woman has scarred me for life. I never want to take Bella on a walk alone. Now my mom walks the terrier jack Russell mix mutt Franklin and Bella herself. I walk next to her.


Hi I’m Jordan. I just turned twenty one on Friday. I go to Immaculata University. My major is history, and my minor might be criminology. My interests are Indiana Jones, Star Wars, Marvel, and some other Disney movies. I love Disney World. My favorite animals are cheetahs , bats, dolphins, wolves, dogs and cats. I also love shopping, movies, some zoo animals,boxing and watching tv. I have epilepsy cerebral palsy and speech problems. It is very hard to live with disabilities. I’ve been picked on and bullied from elementary to middle school. One day I’d like to able to drive a car but i can’t because I have epilepsy. I’ve dreamed about moving away from home and my parents. I’d still need help with a lot of stuff if I moved out.